Hysterical Headlines (Funny or Absurd) for December 27th:
Bottom Line: These are your daily doses of nonsense from the (often GSS) media and my hot takes...
South Beach Snake Man Cited for Ripping Off Tourists - Miami New Times
Excerpt: To walk along Ocean Drive is to be transported into an alternate reality. There are street brawls, $80 margarita "specials," and some of the most beautiful art deco buildings in Florida. If you are lucky, you will see pet monkeys wearing jean shorts, shots served for breakfast, and bikini-clad women twerking atop Lamborghinis.
You'll also find a number of weirdos holding actual Burmese pythons...Of course, not everyone has the proper licensing. Last week, investigators with the Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission (FWC) cracked down on illegal operators on Ocean Drive, where they slapped one man with a $500 fine.An FWC report says that on multiple occasions, 68-year-old Samuel Plut was seen handing over his Burmese python to tourists and then stepping away. When he returned, he would hit the tourists up for money.
Hot Take: Any questions? Except about the twerking? Is that still a thing? If it is can we please make it go away?
Trump's First Year Was Even Worse Than Feared Eugene Robinson, Washington Post
Hot Take: Oh my God the sky is falling! Best economy in twelve years, best wage growth in ten. The lowest unemployment rate in seventeen years, record stock market values, third best year for investments since 1900, record retirement account balances...What's next?! Oh crap, that's right starting next Monday the average person will get a 4% raise due to the tax cut! Please make it stop before record numbers of people find success and realize that they don't have to live on government programs! That's the decoded message in this story from Eugene Robinson over at the Washington Post.
America Is Not Yet Lost Paul Krugman, New York Times
Hot take: Well thank God for Paul Krugman and the New York Times! I thought it was all over before this story. Back to the snake man and Ocean Drive depiction. The altered state of reality on South Beach doesn't even compete with the altered state of reality in the ivory towers of GSS media outlets like the Washington Post and New York Times. We're demonstrably doing the best we've done as a country in well over a decade and the headlines from the Times' and Post' are about as 180 degrees out-of-whack as "Dewey beats Truman".
Until tomorrow...